If God were a Woman....(Joke)

 If God were a Woman....

1. Sex would smell like chocolate

2. Farts would smell like roses

3. Dogs would smell spring fresh

4. Babies would come from vending machines

5. Men would be born with a permanent erection

6. All women would have the same size breasts

7. There would be no cellulite

8. Every food on the planet would be FAT FREE

9. Men would be born with an "OFF" switch

10. There would be no "Hooters"

11. A man's paycheck would be made payable to his wife

12. All menstrual cycles would be replaced with a 5-8 day vacation in Hawaii!

13. Men would inherit the menstrual cycle

14. Men would come with software to be custom designed

15. Men would come equipped with homing device for quick location by Wife

16. Men would have a built in lie detector on forehead for instant Verification of truth

17. Men would be intelligent enough to tell the Difference between six inches and three inches

18. Sex would last longer than 30 seconds

19. Foreplay would not be a quick slap on the fanny and a kiss on the Cheek

20. Viagra becomes an over the counter drug.